So a friend was telling me he was taking a few days off work. He said he was going on a bender that evening.
"Have you got any pets?" I said.
"No, I don't have any pets, but I have a wife," he said.
"Good one," I chuckled.
"I'm thinking of having her put down."
"The reason why I was asking if you had pets," I giggled, "was I could just imagine you sprawled like a cat after your boozing session."
"I can't stand cats!" he said.
"How can you not like cats!" I was horrified.
"They have no purpose."
"What do you mean?"
"All they do all day is sit around and lick themselves."
"That's why I love cats, they are so adorable just being themselves," I said. "Of the big cats, lions are my absolute favourite, but it's illegal to have them as pets."
"Hmmm, a lion as a pet? At least it will keep burglars out."
"Yeah, I can just imagine someone coming in the house and being greeted by a lion," I chuckled. "That's too funny!"
"If you're going to have a lion as a pet, why not have a rhino? Fancy having a rhino in your living room."
By then, my friend and I were killing ourselves laughing.
If I ever do decide to have a pet, I think I'll stick to smaller animals.
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