Thursday, 18 September 2008

Impersonal, Personal and Special Relationships

While there is only one Love I experience three kinds of love: impersonal, personal and special.

Impersonal love is the love I feel for everyone. By this I mean, I wish everyone happiness and the very best in all their endeavours, whether I know them or not; whether we get on or not. I feel the same love for animals, birds, nature, and all in the universe. Also, when I share my experiences on the Internet I am loving impersonally.

Personal love is the love I feel for my family and friends. I care about what happens to them on a personal level and I'm curious to know what makes them tick.

And then there is special love, which is in a different league.

At the library I frequent a lot, I have made friends with several security guards. I interact with most of them on an impersonal level i.e. I say hello and wish them well. I enjoy chatting to a few of the guys and having a laugh with them. I even flirt with one of them, who I shall call "Harry." However, there is one particularly guy (I'll call "Peter") who I have a very special bond with. All the others have noticed our special relationship.

The other day Harry said to me, "How come you don't love me the same way you love Peter?"

"I do love you. I love everyone the same," I said.

"But you're not as true to me as you are to Peter."

"OK, for now I'm true to you, OK?" I giggled.

Harry had made a good point. Why do I feel that special bond with Peter and not with the others? I'm not interested in Peter in a sexual or romantic sense, the love I feel for him goes beyond that, it's a love with no strings attached. Peter and I just hit it off and get on like a house on fire. He's is not interested in spiritual stuff, I don't even know if he even believes in God. I love cats and he can't stand them. We've never socialised outside the library and I can't even see it happening. I just love speaking to him about stuff and we have such a giggle. Being with him is very easy; it's like being by myself and enjoying my own company.

I have a friend who lives in Ireland who I feel this special love for. Even though we came from different backgrounds, we just hit it off. We used to hang out a lot until she emigrated, but we still kept in touch. I even went to visit her when she was living in Thailand. She eventually moved to Ireland. Now some might argue that for a friendship to continue you need to give it the attention it deserves. I don't feel that kind of pressure about this friend. I haven't seen her in several years. I didn't even attend her wedding last year nor have I seen her son (though I have seen his photo), but the love I feel for my friend transcends even friendship. I only have to think of her and I know she feels me and vice versa. We are one and nothing can break that bond. We exchange emails from time to time and I know I'll see her again soon.

The three kinds of love I've described reminds me of the different kinds of relationship one can have with God. You can experience God as an impersonal presence that loves all equally. There's the personal relationship you can have with God where you can speak to God as a friend and companion. Then there's the special relationship that I can only describe as oneness. In oneness there is no separation; you're simply in joy communing with yourself.

I have to say, I've only felt that special love with a few people. This love is an unbreakable bond that transcends beliefs, time, and space.

I'm very grateful for my special relationships as they enable me to experience the joy and wonder of being myself.


Related articles: Let's Talk Pets; Love Conquers All; Gift of Love - The Rose; The Magic Formula; My Dream Play Mate; Always at One; An Unbreakable Bond; Devotion; Hugs and Kisses